I can’t believe she actually did it. She left him for me. I can’t dump her now. Shit. She must be some kind of psycho. Who leaves a CPA with a six figure salary for some sappy “I love you’s?” Don’t suppose there is any chance he’d take her back after this. If she thinks I’m gonna stay just because she fucked up her cushy life she’s got another thing coming. I’m not staying for nobody. Get out of my bed, take off my shirt, wipe that dopey smirk off your face, get your floral suitcase and get the fuck out of my apartment. I never wanted you here. You were just supposed to take me out to some nice places, open your legs and then leave me the fuck alone. I’m not your god damned white knight.
The room was non-smoking, but he was a rebel. That's what she loved about him, right? "Lets go drive the wrong way down a one way street." Every day was an adventure.
Her: God I cant believe how rough he was tonight. I wonder if somethings on his mind. Maybe he's mad at me for burning dinner tonight, and used sex to hurt me as a way to show his anger.
Him: I can't keep doing this stupid bitch. I can not wait to leave her. And how burnt was that pot roast tonight?
But why Peter, why cant you figure it out? I told you Lorie, I have feelings for you but I just don't want to jump too far ahead of myself in this things. This thing? this thing! Peter. You mean our relationship. Yeah Lorie our "relationship" What? What the hell is that supposed to mean Peter? Uh I don't know Lorie how bout that fact that your my best friends mother. Yeah, Peter, that's right I am your best friends mother. Yet that didn't seem to bother you last night when you fucked me. Excuse me! Wait, wait, wait. Who was begging me to do all those things to her that hubby wouldn't do. You were coming on to me just as much Peter and you know it. Now we have to both be adults about this and...Peter. Are you listening to me Peter? Peter?
The person on the bed is feeling used and not loved. The man isn't feeling so satisfied, he is kind of disappointed. The person on the bed is confused and lost, because she doesn't know where this relationship is heading and where it is now. She thinks it is just about sexual intimacy with no real friendly interactions. Just sex.
What have I turned him into? He looks fucking dead. Maybe it's the lighting. I never noticed how far back his hairline receded. God damn things looks like a desert. Life hasn't existed anywhere near this creature for a long time, real walking zombie. Jesus, why do I keep doing this? I feel like that cigarette. Knowing i'm killing someone yet, there isn't a fucking thing I can do to stop myself. At least we gave up on staying at his place, couldn't imagine having to defend myself like that. I've never been one for confrontation. And I sure as hell have never had to use this "protection" I got in my bag. That's not saying I haven't wanted too. No. No. No. Can't drift into violence. Great, another thing on my plate. And I already feel fat as shit. This isn't the first time I've thought these thoughts. I'm not even going to pretend it's the last. When will I say no? When will I be able to put an end to this? It's time I washed my hands of this whole thing. *sigh* At least he's got a daughter who seems to enjoy soccer. Too bad about that jerk off carbon copy son of his. Poor kid.
Maybe this is how I want it to be. It's not the image I had in my mind, of how a relationship is supposed to feel, but everything I've done has brought me to this place. Instead of seeing each other as equals who are working toward a common goal, we try to be at odds with one another. Arguments feel like destinations. We worked to get here, and now we can revel in our own private misery. But it's not private because we do it together. It's what we share between us. And for it to succeed we've got to play our rolls convincingly. It's like a play with us as the actors and the audience, all at once. But I don't think I want to play this part anymore despite the fact that I'm damn good at it. Life is as much about what you miss as it is about what you get good at without noticing it.
It's 6 o'clock and the sun shuts down over this dirty city. "Dirt-city.." she says. Heh! Yeah, she would know. If I play it safe I might be able to persuade this Dame to risk me up a secret or two, or an inkling to what else she's got hidden inside of her. Why is she really looking for her ex-husband anyway? Can't be the sex. And what kinda lame brained Doll calls herself 'Cookie' and expects you to trust her? Judging by the size of the sugar bowl, I'd say by now she trusts me...enough. It's just too bad I can smell the fire through her clothes,...or from a mile away. Your guess is as good as mine and it's getting more than just hot in here. It's gettin' hairy. Hot and hairy and this is no time for primping. I'd say it's time I pillow talk my way to some answers."
Okay great shot guys. Candi you were spectacular as always. Yes, Jackson, you can have a ciggie if you want one. It's alright we're done for today. What was that Candi? Yeah, you can take a rest and get dressed if you really want to. You two were great. Oh, Candi, if you would just try to be a little more realistic next time? I mean the moaning was a nice touch, but your face looked bored. It was like you were doing this as your job. Yeah, I know it's your job, but some people probably think that some of this is real. Jackson, it'll be up on the website in a few hours, just in case you wanted to rub one out. I need to edit some stuff. I'm not sure some people will be into the fetish stuff you guys just did...
Photo by Nan Goldin
I can’t believe she actually did it. She left him for me. I can’t dump her now. Shit. She must be some kind of psycho. Who leaves a CPA with a six figure salary for some sappy “I love you’s?” Don’t suppose there is any chance he’d take her back after this. If she thinks I’m gonna stay just because she fucked up her cushy life she’s got another thing coming. I’m not staying for nobody. Get out of my bed, take off my shirt, wipe that dopey smirk off your face, get your floral suitcase and get the fuck out of my apartment. I never wanted you here. You were just supposed to take me out to some nice places, open your legs and then leave me the fuck alone. I’m not your god damned white knight.
ReplyDeleteThe room was non-smoking, but he was a rebel. That's what she loved about him, right? "Lets go drive the wrong way down a one way street." Every day was an adventure.
ReplyDelete"Oh, God," she thought, "is this really my life?"
(Thoughts only)
ReplyDeleteHer: God I cant believe how rough he was tonight. I wonder if somethings on his mind. Maybe he's mad at me for burning dinner tonight, and used sex to hurt me as a way to show his anger.
Him: I can't keep doing this stupid bitch. I can not wait to leave her. And how burnt was that pot roast tonight?
But why Peter, why cant you figure it out? I told you Lorie, I have feelings for you but I just don't want to jump too far ahead of myself in this things. This thing? this thing! Peter. You mean our relationship. Yeah Lorie our "relationship" What? What the hell is that supposed to mean Peter? Uh I don't know Lorie how bout that fact that your my best friends mother. Yeah, Peter, that's right I am your best friends mother. Yet that didn't seem to bother you last night when you fucked me. Excuse me! Wait, wait, wait. Who was begging me to do all those things to her that hubby wouldn't do. You were coming on to me just as much Peter and you know it. Now we have to both be adults about this and...Peter. Are you listening to me Peter? Peter?
ReplyDeleteThe person on the bed is feeling used and not loved. The man isn't feeling so satisfied, he is kind of disappointed. The person on the bed is confused and lost, because she doesn't know where this relationship is heading and where it is now. She thinks it is just about sexual intimacy with no real friendly interactions. Just sex.
ReplyDeleteWhat have I turned him into? He looks fucking dead. Maybe it's the lighting. I never noticed how far back his hairline receded. God damn things looks like a desert. Life hasn't existed anywhere near this creature for a long time, real walking zombie. Jesus, why do I keep doing this? I feel like that cigarette. Knowing i'm killing someone yet, there isn't a fucking thing I can do to stop myself. At least we gave up on staying at his place, couldn't imagine having to defend myself like that. I've never been one for confrontation. And I sure as hell have never had to use this "protection" I got in my bag. That's not saying I haven't wanted too. No. No. No. Can't drift into violence. Great, another thing on my plate. And I already feel fat as shit. This isn't the first time I've thought these thoughts. I'm not even going to pretend it's the last. When will I say no? When will I be able to put an end to this? It's time I washed my hands of this whole thing. *sigh* At least he's got a daughter who seems to enjoy soccer. Too bad about that jerk off carbon copy son of his. Poor kid.
ReplyDeleteMaybe this is how I want it to be.
ReplyDeleteIt's not the image I had in my mind, of how a relationship is supposed to feel, but everything I've done has brought me to this place. Instead of seeing each other as equals who are working toward a common goal, we try to be at odds with one another. Arguments feel like destinations. We worked to get here, and now we can revel in our own private misery. But it's not private because we do it together. It's what we share between us. And for it to succeed we've got to play our rolls convincingly. It's like a play with us as the actors and the audience, all at once. But I don't think I want to play this part anymore despite the fact that I'm damn good at it. Life is as much about what you miss as it is about what you get good at without noticing it.
It's 6 o'clock and the sun shuts down over this dirty city. "Dirt-city.." she says. Heh! Yeah, she would know.
ReplyDeleteIf I play it safe I might be able to persuade this Dame to risk me up a secret or two, or an inkling to what else she's got hidden inside of her. Why is she really looking for her ex-husband anyway? Can't be the sex. And what kinda lame brained Doll calls herself 'Cookie' and expects you to trust her?
Judging by the size of the sugar bowl, I'd say by now she trusts me...enough.
It's just too bad I can smell the fire through her clothes,...or from a mile away. Your guess is as good as mine and it's getting more than just hot in here. It's gettin' hairy. Hot and hairy and this is no time for primping. I'd say it's time I pillow talk my way to some answers."
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteOkay great shot guys. Candi you were spectacular as always. Yes, Jackson, you can have a ciggie if you want one. It's alright we're done for today. What was that Candi? Yeah, you can take a rest and get dressed if you really want to. You two were great. Oh, Candi, if you would just try to be a little more realistic next time? I mean the moaning was a nice touch, but your face looked bored. It was like you were doing this as your job. Yeah, I know it's your job, but some people probably think that some of this is real. Jackson, it'll be up on the website in a few hours, just in case you wanted to rub one out. I need to edit some stuff. I'm not sure some people will be into the fetish stuff you guys just did...
ReplyDelete